We are walking along a gravel road lined with trees. It is into
the fall and the leaves rustle under our feet and in the trees when the wind
blows. It is a bright clear day and the sun is warm on our faces. The sun
filters through the leaves and dapples the air – like walking through a
kaleidoscope. We are waking hand in hand and we are talking about anything and
everything.
The lake just down the hill is flat and still. It sits like a
mirror among the hills and trees. The only break in the water is a lone loon
making his way toward the sun.
'Where do you want to go?' I ask you.
You answer "There is a meadow just around the other side of
the lake. The sun will be shining on it when we get there. There is a beautiful
big tree in the middle for shade - it's a perfect place. Do you want to walk
there?"
"I will walk anywhere with you. A meadow, you say?" I
answer with a slight smile on my face which does not escape your notice.
"Why are you smiling?" you ask, thinking that you know
the answer. This time though, you are wrong.
"I like meadows. Will I like this one? Have I been to
it?" I tease you.
"You have never been to this meadow but you will love it - I
promise" you answer.
We walk, hand in hand, shoulders touching. We smell the earth and
look at the lake through the trees. The sun through the leaves and branches and
the colour of leaves act as a kaleidoscope and leave us dizzy with wonder.
We round the end of the lake. The loon calls and moves further
down the lake - away from us. A smile plays on my lips. I have a secret - you
know now that I do - but you cannot guess it.
"What
are you thinking?" you ask me.
"I am thinking that I like meadows - and that I love you -
and that you are beautiful in the filtered sun - the dappled shadows, the light
playing across your face - I would die happy if yours were the last face
that I got to see - just as it is now" I answer.
You look down at the ground. My words are too heavy for you and
you cannot carry them because you cannot believe that they are true - though in
your heart you know that they are. You wrestle for a moment - part of you
telling you that you don't deserve such praise - your heart telling you to
soar. I watch you and see the conflict on your face, your whole body. I look at
the arch of your neck and the almost sad and downcast eyes. I look at you like
this and I am more in love with you than before I said those words.
You wrestle and the heart wins as I know it will as long as I am
beside you. You raise your head to look into my eyes and so that I can look
into yours. What I see in your eyes is something that I cannot describe but my
heart knows is something close and big. It is a feeling that can fill you until
you are ripped in half.
"I love you" is your only verbal answer, but you have
already said more that you could with a lifetime of words.
"I have a surprise for you" I say and give you a playful
bump with my hip.
"What is it?" you ask smiling now - eyes sparkling in
the sun.
"Take me to your meadow and I will give you your
surprise" I say. So we continue our walk, arm in arm now so that we can
feel closer. We take small path to the left that veers off the main road.
The trees are closer and the smell of the woods fills our heads with earth and
leaves and light. The sounds of the woods are quiet but somehow more
pronounced. A woodpecker in the distance, some squirrel rustling leaves...
everything seems -more- somehow.
Suddenly we break through the woods and enter a wide open space
bursting with light. The heat of the meadow is in startling contrast to the
coolness of the woods. We remove our jackets immediately and run playfully into
the meadow. We send small white butterflies into flight, disturbing their rest
on the wild flowers. The smell of grass is heavy in the air. I am running ahead
of you and I turn back to look at you. You come up to me and throw your arms
around me. You kiss me - it is deep and urgent and forceful. Your arms hold me
tight as your tongue dances in my mouth. I have my arms around your waist, pulling
you close. I am surprised by the suddenness and power of your kiss but I
respond instantly in kind. I kiss you to let you know that I am feeling what
you feel. I am in love with you and I desperately want you.
We break off from the kiss but don't let go of each other.
"What is my surprise? I brought you to my meadow, now keep your
promise"
"Follow me" I say and I take you by the hand leading you
toward the large maple tree in the center of the meadow.
When we get to the tree you notice a backpack resting against the
trunk and recognize it as mine. You look at me and I have a huge smile on my
face.
"When did you put that here?" you ask incredulously.
"Early this morning - you were still sleeping. I packed us a
picnic - sandwiches, spritzer I made up, fruit - an orange. I also have a
blanket." I remove the thick blanket an spread it out on the grass in the
sun, still close to the tree. You sit down and remove your shoes while I kneel
and start taking the food out of the backpack.
We are ravenous and eat our sandwiches without talking. I pour the
drinks and we sip them together.
"Would you like to share an orange?" I ask
"uh huh" is the only answer I need.
I peel the orange as you lie back to look up into the tree. A
happy content smile plays on your lips and you are like a goddess - beautiful
and strong and once again confident in your own power and person. I lie down
beside you with an orange slice in my mouth and turn toward you. You take half
the orange into your mouth and we bite down together. The juice fills our
mouths, sits on our tongues and dribbles down our chins. Our lips together
begin to feel for each other. The orange halved and swallowed, we kiss. Our
tongues play and dart; our lips brush against each other and we can taste sweetness
that comes from more than the orange.
I put my arm across you and pull you close to me...
