I wish that I could tell you...

Angel,

I wish I could tell you that…

sometimes I am lonely.

sometimes I am frustrated with our situation.

sometimes I am angry when you go away.

sometimes you go away when I need you most.

sometimes I think dark thoughts.

sometimes I think that I could go back to her and make it work.

sometimes I wonder if I made the right decisions.

sometimes I wonder if I will ever have the kind of love that I want.

sometimes I am afraid of growing old alone.

I have killed possible relationships before they can start.

I want to marry you.

I wish you wanted to be with me as much as I want to be you.

I worry about our future together.

I worry about you.

I hate it when things are not good between us.

But I can’t tell you these things… you will take them as your responsibility.

And I do not want to focus on the negative.

So I tell you everything else… I tell you all of the things that bring me joy…

I share with you the way you make me feel, the way I see you…

I tell you about your beauty.

I tell you about the wonders that I see.

I share with you all of the love and beauty that I see and feel and keep the fleeting negative moments from you. You don’t need to see the darker side of me.

Just Me.